Once in a LIFETIME TRIP.....

Agent Matilda: Thank you for calling OneWay Ticket Only! My name is Matilda. How may I help you today?
Customer Mersand: I would like to purchase a ticket from Single Life to Married Life.
Agent Matilda:That would not be a problem. Can I have your birth date please?
Customer Mersand: Why do you ask for my birth date?
Agent Matilda: It is for us to identify that the passengers are not minors. Because unaccompanied minors will be denied boarding, flight to Married Life is for passenger with legal age only.
Customer Mersand: So, what you mean is I should be of legal age before I take the flight?
Agent Matilda: Correct. Without your birthdate we cannot issue any ticket. Can I have your birthday please?
Customer Mersand: Ok my birth date is August 2, 1981
Agent Matilda: I also need the birth date of your companion.
Customer Mersand: I would be traveling alone and my companion will just follow on a different date.
Agent Matilda: I’m sorry Ma’am but the flight to Married Life requires a companion. Without a companion, ticket will not be issued.
Customer Mersand: Ahhh so another requirement is that you have a companion?
Agent Matilda: Yes.
Customer Mersand: Oh well. Okay, his birth date is October 18, 1979.
Agent Matilda: So, I see that you and your companion are of legal age and are allowed to travel to Married Life. Can I have the names of the passengers?
Customer Mersand: Ms. Melizza _ (spelled the name) and Mr. Elmer _ (spelled the name)
Agent Matilda: Thank you very much. When is the travel date and time that you prefer?
Customer Mersand: I would like to travel on May 21, 2009 at 2:30PM, is that flight available?
Agent Matilda: Let me check with my system here.
(Agent checks and verifies with the system if there’s availability and gets back to the customer).
Agent Matilda: Ok, I see here that there are 2 seats available on the flight from Single Life to Married Life on May 21, 2009. It will depart Single Life at 2:30PM and will arrive in Married Life at 3:30PM at the terminal called St. Michael the Archangel Parish.
Customer Mersand: That’s perfect. So, much does it cost?
Agent Matilda: I have great news! The flight From Single Life to Married Life is free of charge. Zero fare.
Customer Mersand: Really, that’s wonderful! (customer smiling)
Agent Matilda: Yes, the flight is free. However, there are applicable taxes and fees mandated by the Philippine Government and the Church and other surcharges.
Customer Mersand: Ha!? I though it’s free. And how much will it cost me?
Agent Matilda: These fees are mandated by the law and we can’t do anything about it. The cost of the taxes and fees will depend on where the travelers get the required documents, package of the reception and church fees and miscellaneous. It is the sole discretion of the travelers with regards to their spending limit and OneWay Ticket Only does not interfere with the traveler’s decision. We only issue the ticket.
Customer Mersand: Oh I see then. Okay (sigh) we will take the flight.
Agent Matilda: Alright then. But before I issue the ticket let me read to you the rules of this ticket.
Customer Mersand: Okay.
Agent Matilda: This ticket has a very restrictive rule.
Customer Mersand: What do you mean by that?!
Agent Matilda: Cancellations and changes made before the departure date is allowed. Cancellations and changes made after check-in is not permitted. It says here that the ticket is nontransferable, non refundable and non-changeable once you checked-in.
Customer Mersand: What do you mean by these rules? Who do I call for changes?
Agent Matilda: Just dial the number that you dialed today and an agent will assist you. Just provide the birth date of the passengers for us to view your flight. With the rules, it means that once you crossed the border of Single Life there’s no turning back. Taxes and fees will not be refunded and you cannot change the date of travel, name of companion and the destination. This is a very restrictive ticket. And also this is a one way ticket to Married Life. Issuance of return flight to Single Life is not permitted.
Customer Mersand: How can that be? What if I decided to go back to Single Life? Is that possible?
Agent Matilda: OneWay Ticket Only does not offer roundtrip ticket of Single Life-Married Life-Single Life. The ticket that we issue is solely for Single Life to Married Life destination only. We do not offer cars, hotels or package. We only issue flights. For the return flight to Single Life, a different department handles that case and it can only be taken advantage once you’ve crossed the border of Single Life. I’m sorry but we cannot disclose any other information regarding the return flight to Single Life.
(agent took a deep breath and continued) I see here that the rule applies when you’ve checked in, but you can change or cancel the flight prior to the day of travel. (agent pause) It means that if you decided not to leave Single Life, all you have to do is call and cancel the flight.
Customer Mersand: Do I get refund of the taxes and fees.
Agent Matilda: I cannot assure you of that. Church, hotel, reception and City Civil Registrar have their own policy in regards to refunds. You may deal with them directly.
Customer Mersand: I see then. So, this means that once we get to Married Life, there’s no turning back.
Agent Matilda: Exactly! You have to live with each other as long as you both live. Married Life is not a destination. It is a journey that you and your companion would take hand in hand.
Customer Mersand: Okay. How about the baggage?
Agent Matilda: As for the baggage, you can take as much baggage as you want. There is no limit as long as you both can handle it.
Customer Mersand: That is so great! I will purchase the ticket.
Agent Matilda: There are few reminders that you need to bring and present in the check in counter. If you prefer Civil Wedding, please don’t forget to bring the copies of Application for Marriage License issued by the Civil Registrar of your local government, Name of witnesses at least 2 witnesses (1 male and 1 female) and the rings. For Church Wedding, please don’t forget copies of Application for Marriage License issued by the Civil Registrar of your local government, Name of primary sponsors (godmothers and godfathers), Rings, Coins, Veil, Cord, Bible, Candle and Secondary Sponsors if you have. Without these requirements you will be denied in boarding. Please be reminded that the Church and Presiding Judge have the right to void the flight if you did not comply with the requirements.
Customer Mersand: We have that all ready and I’ll bear that in mind. I will place all of that in my carry on luggage.
Agent Matilda: Another thing is that, it is a must that the Primary Sponsors should affix their signature in the copies of Application for Marriage License issued by the Civil Registrar of your local government or else you will be both deported to Single Life.
Customer Mersand: Okay, I have take note of that.
Agent Matilda: Okay then, so do you agree with the rules and restrictions imposed by the flight from Single Life to Married Life?
Customer Mersand: Yes, I fully understand the rules and restrictions of the flight.
Agent Matilda: Alright then, you’re ticket has been issued and you are ready to go! Will there be anything else that I may assist you regarding this matter?
Customer Mersand: Uhmm, I think that would be all. When do I get our tickets?
Agent Matilda: Ahh, your tickets. Okay, here you you, this is a ticketless ticket and all you have to do is give your confirmation code to the check in counter. Do you have a pen and paper ready?
Customer Mersand: Yes, I have. What is the confirmation code?
Agent Matilda: Confirmation code for Elmer _ is "Will you Marry Me?", and for Melizza _ is "Yes, I do".
Customer Mersand: Okay, I got it.
Agent Matilda: Oh, by the way, don't forget to pack a lot of LOVE, TRUST, UNDERSTANDING and FAITH in GOD. This will bring joy and happiness in your stay in Married Life.
Customer Mersand: Yes we will.
Agent Matilda: Already! Thank you for calling OneWay Ticket Only and have a safe and happy journey to Married Life!